“Charlotte M.” annoying attack of influencer Silver, horror parody

LOVE & ICE CREAM Welcome to a Rome where everyone drives around the roundabouts in an orderly car and where young people don’t mumble with a Roman accent. Merit of a bestseller adapted to film, where the American Lina flies to the capital at the behest of her deceased mother. With dialogues that are more improbable to say the least than the total absence of wild boars and holes.

BEAST After the shark, here is the killer lion who massacres men with one move. A widowed doctor (the inexpressive Idris Elba) and his two daughters, traveling in South Africa amidst family tensions, know this well. With a predictable plot like an increase in the gas bill. Horrendous computer images and some scenes so improbable that they transform horror into an irresistible comedy film.

THE CHRISTMAS SHOW The widow Sofia and her children must participate in the Christmas Show, a sort of Big Brother within the walls of the house. Perfect film to summarize the increasingly declining state of the Italian comedy. Difficult to find a positive thing between improbable situations, trivial dialogues, stereotyped characters, acting from the first reading of the script. Poor Italy.

LAMB A sheep gives birth to a half-human lamb which is adopted by a couple, as if nothing had happened. And there are those who rewarded him for his originality…

THE TALENT OF MR. C Cage impersonates himself. In need of money, he agrees to attend a billionaire’s birthday party, paid for. With a paradoxical thriller twist. A truly silly film for plot and platitudes served. Anyway, unbelievable but true: Nicolas Cage plays Nicolas Cage and manages to be out of the way.

THE SEX OF ANGELS Don Pieraccioni inherits a brothel in Switzerland. And here he goes with double meanings, sparing us, at least, the bad word. Which in any case the spectator, mentally, utters while regretting the euros paid for a comedy (so to speak), sluggish, repetitive, predictable. Ninety minutes wasted.

ALMOST ORPHAN Not only do we remake French films all the time, but also bad ones. The result here is a film of chilling banality. Scamarcio and Puccini are two successful designers. He disowned the Apulian family of humble origins. When the relatives show up in Milan, the misunderstandings will be wasted. Like yawning and cursing over wasted euros.

DIABOLIK – GINKO ON THE ATTACK! More than the attack, here poor Ginko (Mastandrea), goes to the defense of the category of actors, unique in the part in a totally wrong cast. Starting with the protagonist, Giacomo Gianniotti, who is to Diabolik like a politician to a kept electoral promise. There is also Bellucci who is Ginko’s lover and you expect her to exclaim: «Ambrogio, I feel a little peckish».

BLACK GLASSES A blind escort is being hunted by a serial killer. Argento shoots a film full of forced dialogues and involuntarily comic scenes, such as the policewoman who gives the girl a business card and says “see you tonight”. Not to mention a Pastorelli, always in a miniskirt, completely out of place. More than a horror, it seems like a parody of her.

CHARLOTTE M. It is not only the worst film of the year, but of the last decade. The protagonist is an influencer with millions of followers who takes advantage of the goose that lays the golden eggs, also trying to make it in the cinema. Acting? Inexistent. Plot? From elementary school. Film script? Unintentionally comical. The Milanese saying applies: «Ofelè fa el to mestè!».

“Charlotte M.” annoying attack of influencer Silver, horror parody